I made it back to Chinatown yesterday as the sun was blazing, so I was able to capture a much nicer photo to celebrate the Chinese New Year that occurs tomorrow. Happy Year of the Goat, everyone! Or, as was brought to my attention, the Year of the Sheep! Your preference, I guess.

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I choose goat because I raised a herd of pygmies briefly (like, I might’ve milked one once in an effort to save a newborn), but look at me with this adorable baby sheep (that’s a “lamb” for all you city kids)!

Kayla with Lamb

I do challenge you not to look at that “blemish”/raging Easter zit in between my eyes, but good luck with that.

Anyway, I’ve had some time to contemplate what I resolve to do this year, and I’ve decided to focus on my mental health. God knows I should probably see a therapist about something at least, but that’s not what I’m talking about. Besides, I’m too broke/selfish with my money to see a therapist and you’ll notice that I’ll make no mention of my financial health anywhere in this post.

I have spent the first month and a half in a new city feeling pretty damn sorry for myself and my unemployment, and all the hoop-jumping that comes along with the job search. Phone interviews, group interviews, second interviews, video interviews, bullshit bullshit bullshit all for rejection after rejection. Plus, I’m soooooooooo  talented at feeling sorry for myself and telling people how sorry I feel for myself. Hi, guys.

I was watching an episode of Girls yesterday, and Hannah was laying in bed crying about something and I thought, “Wow, she is annoying and pathetic.” Then I took a good, hard, look at myself…laying in bed midday. Lamenting.

Clearly, I need some work done. Since I can’t get a boob job or a nose job at the moment, I’m going to have to try some alternate routes.

My main goal this year is to figure out what I’m really passionate about and good at and make it a career. Seems pretty obvious, right? I have some ideas. Maybe it’s something that can’t be accomplished in a year, but I can sure try. I thought I was really passionate about not working, but that’s surprisingly not going as well as I’d thought!

On the road to discovering and claiming my calling (wait, didn’t Wartburg tell me I was going to do this in college??), my next goal is to read more and write more.

After finishing that episode of Girls yesterday, I got off my ass and did something I had been avoiding since I moved here. I went to Powell’s City of Books. The world’s largest independent bookstore. Three blocks away.

I was in there for two hours. I could’ve spent two more hours in there. I got two books and two cheap journals. I’m going to read the books and I’m going to write in the journals. I feel pretty good about it.

(P.S. I found a coffee table in the hallway this weekend, and I love it and can only assume it’s made out of reclaimed barn wood and I’ll probably use it as a backdrop for all the pictures I take in my dark apartment.)

I mean, this blog is kind of like a journal, but I can’t really go around naming names and writing love sex stories on here.

I had a diary when I was in elementary school. I talked about that time my brother used red permanent marker on our white cat and watching a Jonathan Taylor Thomas movie at a sleepover with my friends and how my teacher was a “BITCH, I hope nobody ever reads this.” And I even did it in cursive writing.

Man of the House

In essence, not much has changed since elementary school. I still talk about my cat and I still like JTT and I still like my friends (well, not the same ones) and I still think people are bitches (including some of those old friends from the sleepover). I write in print now, but I still prefer to use colored pens.

My point is that reading and writing make me happy and so I’m going to do more of those things. And hopefully while I’m doing it, I’ll figure out what I’m passionate about and pursue it. And all will be well. And  maybe my reading and writing skills will even improve so next year when I come back to this post to see how I did, I can say, “JESUS WHO LET YOU HAVE A BLOG YOU SUCKED AT THIS SO MUCH AND WHY DON’T YOU EVER USE COMMAS.”

🙂